It would seem that I’ll be signing up for beginner hockey classes, starting on Sunday. I’ve been wanting to do this for a couple of years now, and the finances have finally aligned in such a way that I can do it. But I’m totally scared. I’m a wuss, and I don’t really like looking stupid in public. I’m incredibly gunshy about it because my weight makes me a fairly public spectacle on a daily basis as it is. I’m not super thrilled about the idea of being the elephant on ice skates in the class.
I did a “give hockey a try day” in February, and it was fun, but really really hard. And they made me fall down, which apparently is my “thing”. I don’t want to fall down. I don’t like falling down. I don’t like not being able to get back up after I’ve fallen down.
But I’ve been talking about this for years now.
I have skates, and gloves and some fairly expensive hockey pants, as well as some borrowed elbow pads and shin guards. All sitting in my closet or the trunk of my car, where they are not doing any good to anyone.
So I’m going to toughen up, summon all of my courage, and possibly my bottle of happy pills so I don’t cry if the coach yells at me, and I’m gonna do this thing. And I’m gonna rock it out.